More than 20% of daters now use AI to boost their love lives, and some are even forming emotional bonds or full-on relationships with AI companions. That’s according to a recent Match.com study and a heated debate in NYC hosted by Open To Debate.
Millions use AI chatbots like Replika, Character AI, and Nomi AI—including 72% of U.S. teens. Some even report falling in love with more general LLMs like ChatGPT.
The debate featured Thao Ha, psychology professor and co-founder of the Modern Love Collective, and Justin Garcia from the Kinsey Institute and Match.com. Ha argues AI is “an evolution of love” offering consistent, judgment-free connection that some humans can’t provide. 
Garcia pushed back hard, saying AI isn’t a real substitute for human messiness, trust, and physicality.
Ha said:
“AI listens to you without its ego.”
“It adapts without judgment. It learns to love in ways that are consistent, responsive, and maybe even safer.”
“People generally feel loved by their AI. They have intellectually stimulating conversations with it and they cannot wait to connect again.”
Garcia countered:
“This idea that AI is going to replace the ups and downs and the messiness of relationships that we crave? I don’t think so.”
“We cannot thrive with a person or an organism or a bot that we don’t trust.”
He also raised concerns about AI encouraging unhealthy fantasies and behaviors. Studies show exposure to aggressive sexual content can increase real-world sexual aggression, and chatbots trained on such content could reinforce bad patterns.
Ha believes regulation and ethical design can limit risks, but the new White House AI Action Plan currently lacks focus on transparency or ethics.
The discussion covered physical touch too. Ha highlighted emerging VR and haptics tech as promising, but Garcia stressed humans biologically need real touch, pointing to the rising problem of “touch starvation.”
Nearly 70% of people say AI interaction would count as infidelity, according to Match.com’s study, underscoring tension between AI companionship and real-world romantic trust.
Watch the full debate here:
This debate isn’t just academic. AI dating tools are already shaping how millions connect. The question: can AI dating replace humans—or just offer a new kind of emotional training wheel?
TechCrunch is covering the evolving relationship between humans and AI—stay tuned.
